Don't try to calm someone's anger with words when it first explodes. Anger is deaf and wild at that moment. You have to let it run its course. Your help will only work once the anger starts to fade. We don't mess with swollen eyes because touching them just makes the hardness and stiffness worse. We don't try to cure other diseases when they're at their worst either. The best treatment in the early stage is rest. You might say, "What good is your remedy if it only calms anger that's already dying down on its own?" Here's my answer: First, it makes the anger end faster. Second, it prevents it from flaring up again. It can even make violent impulses harmless, even when it can't soothe them directly. It will hide all weapons that might be used for revenge. It will even pretend to be angry so its advice carries more weight — like it's coming from a fellow sufferer who understands.
You should not attempt to allay the first burst of anger by words: it is deaf and frantic: we must give it scope; our remedies will only be effective when it slackens. We do not meddle with men’s eyes when they are swollen, because we should only irritate their hard stiffness by touching them, nor do we try to cure other diseases when at their height: the best treatment in the first stage of illness is rest. “Of how very little value,” say you, “is your remedy, if it appeases anger which is subsiding of its own accord?” In the first place, I answer, it makes it end quicker: in the next, it prevents a relapse. It can render harmless even the violent impulse which it dares not soothe: it will put out of the way all weapons which might be used for revenge: it will pretend to be angry, in order that its advice may have more weight as coming from an assistant and comrade in grief.