Plain
Epictetus — The Slave

Being alone doesn't make you solitary. Being solitary is feeling helpless. You can be surrounded by people and still feel solitary. You can be truly alone and not feel solitary at all. When we lose a brother, son, or friend we relied on, we say we're left solitary. This happens even in Rome, surrounded by crowds, living among many people, even with lots of slaves around. Someone who is solitary feels helpless and vulnerable to those who want to hurt them. That's why we feel most lonely when traveling and we run into robbers. It's not seeing another human being that removes solitude. It's seeing someone who is trustworthy, decent, and willing to help us.

Discourses, What Solitude Is, and What Kind of Person a Solitary Man is 246 of 388
Human Nature Facing Hardship
Epictetus — The Slave Original

Solitude is a certain condition of a helpless man. For because a man is alone, he is not for that reason also solitary; just as though a man is among numbers, he is not therefore not solitary. When then we have lost either a brother, or a son, or a friend on whom we were accustomed to repose, we say that we are left solitary, though we are often in Rome, though such a crowd meet us, though so many live in the same place, and sometimes we have a great number of slaves. For the man who is solitary, as it is conceived, is considered to be a helpless person and exposed to those who wish to harm him. For this reason when we travel, then especially do we say that we are lonely when we fall among robbers, for it is not the sight of a human creature which removes us from solitude, but the sight of one who is faithful and modest and helpful to us.

Discourses, What Solitude Is, and What Kind of Person a Solitary Man is 246 of 388
Epictetus — The Slave

Strong habits control us. We're used to wanting and avoiding things that aren't up to us. We need to fight this habit with a different habit. When something looks really tempting, that's when you need to practice the most. Later, when you're ready, you can test yourself at the right moment. You'll enter the arena to see if appearances still overpower you like they used to. But first, stay far away from anything stronger than you are. It's not a fair fight between a beautiful young woman and a beginning philosopher. As the saying goes, the clay pot and the rock don't get along.

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Knowing Yourself Freedom & Control
Epictetus — The Slave Original

And since strong habit leads (prevails), and we are accustomed to employ desire and aversion only to things which are not within the power of our will, we ought to oppose to this habit a contrary habit, and where there is great slipperiness in the appearances, there to oppose the habit of exercise. Then at last, if occasion presents itself, for the purpose of trying yourself at a proper time you will descend into the arena to know if appearances overpower you as they did formerly. But at first fly far from that which is stronger than yourself; the contest is unequal between a charming young girl and a beginner in philosophy. The earthen pitcher, as the saying is, and the rock do not agree.

Discourses, About Exercise 245 of 388
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Ancient philosophy, in plain English.

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