Plain
Epictetus — The Slave

Someone gets promoted to a high position? Everyone who meets him congratulates him. One person kisses his eyes, another his neck, and his servants kiss his hands. He goes home and finds torches lit in his honor. He climbs the Capitol and makes a sacrifice to celebrate. But who ever makes a sacrifice for having good desires? Who sacrifices for acting according to nature? The truth is, we thank the gods for things we think are good for us.

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What Matters Most Human Nature
Epictetus — The Slave Original

Has a man been exalted to the tribuneship? All who meet him offer their congratulations; one kisses his eyes, another the neck, and the slaves kiss his hands. He goes to his house, he finds torches lighted. He ascends the Capitol; he offers a sacrifice on the occasion. Now who ever sacrificed for having had good desires? for having acted conformably to nature? For in fact we thank the gods for those things in which we place our good.

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Epictetus — The Slave

So what happens? When we have foolish ideas about things we can't control — when we think these things are good or bad — we end up having to care what tyrants think. I wish people only had to worry about tyrants, not also about the emperor's bedroom attendants. How does a man suddenly become wise just because Caesar put him in charge of the emperor's toilet? Why do we immediately say, "Felicion gave me good advice"? I wish he'd get kicked out of the bedroom, so you could see he's still a fool.

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Freedom & Control What Matters Most
Epictetus — The Slave Original

What then? When absurd notions about things independent of our will, as if they were good and (or) bad, lie at the bottom of our opinions, we must of necessity pay regard to tyrants: for I wish that men would pay regard to tyrants only, and not also to the bedchamber men. How is it that the man becomes all at once wise, when Cæsar has made him superintendent of the close stool? How is it that we say immediately, Felicion spoke sensibly to me? I wish he were ejected from the bedchamber, that he might again appear to you to be a fool.

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Ancient philosophy, in plain English.

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