Plain
Epictetus — The Slave

Your duties depend on your relationships. Is someone your father? Then you should care for him, respect him, and take his criticism patiently. But what if he's a bad father? Your natural duty isn't to a good father — it's to a father, period. Is your brother unfair? Keep being fair to him anyway. Don't focus on what he does. Focus on what you need to do to keep your character in line with nature. Another person can't hurt you unless you let them. You only get hurt when you choose to be hurt. Practice this way of thinking with all your relationships — neighbor, fellow citizen, boss. You'll know what your duties are in each case.

The Enchiridion, Section 30 39 of 70
Doing The Right Thing Human Nature
Epictetus — The Slave Original

Duties are universally measured by relations. Is a certain man your father? In this are implied taking care of him, submitting to him in all things, patiently receiving his reproaches, his correction. But he is a bad father. Is your natural tie, then, to a _good_ father? No, but to a father. Is a brother unjust? Well, preserve your own just relation toward him. Consider not what _he_ does, but what _you_ are to do to keep your own will in a state conformable to nature, for another cannot hurt you unless you please. You will then be hurt when you consent to be hurt. In this manner, therefore, if you accustom yourself to contemplate the relations of neighbor, citizen, commander, you can deduce from each the corresponding duties.

The Enchiridion, Section 30 39 of 70
Epictetus — The Slave

You'll lose out to others in everything — job promotions, public recognition, court cases. When you've fully thought through all these costs, then approach philosophy if you want — but only if you're willing to give up these things to buy peace of mind, freedom, and calm. If not, don't bother. Don't be like children who play at being a philosopher one day, a tax collector the next, then a public speaker, then a government official. These roles don't mix. You must be one person, either good or bad. You must develop either your own thinking or chase external things. Focus either on what's inside you or what's outside you — be either a philosopher or just another person in the crowd.

The Enchiridion, Section 29 38 of 70
Knowing Yourself What Matters Most
Epictetus — The Slave Original

come off worse than others in everything—in offices, in honors, before tribunals. When you have fully considered all these things, approach, if you please—that is, if, by parting with them, you have a mind to purchase serenity, freedom, and tranquillity. If not, do not come hither; do not, like children, be now a philosopher, then a publican, then an orator, and then one of Caesar's officers. These things are not consistent. You must be one man, either good or bad. You must cultivate either your own reason or else externals; apply yourself either to things within or without you—that is, be either a philosopher or one of the mob.

The Enchiridion, Section 29 38 of 70
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Ancient philosophy, in plain English.

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