On Anger, Book 3, Section 12 — In Plain English

Seneca — The Senator

Most people create their own problems. They imagine threats that don't exist or blow small issues out of proportion. Sometimes anger finds us, but more often we go looking for it. We should never invite anger in. Even when it shows up on our doorstep, we should push it away. No one ever stops to think, "I've done this exact same thing myself" or "I could easily do what this person did." We focus only on what was done, not on why it was done. But we should think about the person's intentions. Did they mean to hurt us, or was it an accident? Were they forced into it, or did they make an honest mistake? Maybe they weren't even thinking about us at all — they might have been trying to help themselves or do a favor for a friend.

Seneca — The Senator Original

A large part of mankind manufacture their own grievances either by entertaining unfounded suspicions or by exaggerating trifles. Anger often comes to us, but we often go to it. It ought never to be sent for: even when it falls in our way it ought to be flung aside. No one says to himself, "I myself have done or might have done this very thing which I am angry with another for doing." No one considers the intention of the doer, but merely the thing done: yet we ought to think about him, and whether he did it intentionally or accidentally, under compulsion or under a mistake, whether he did it out of hatred for us, or to gain something for himself, whether he did it to please himself or to serve a friend.