Plain
Seneca — The Senator

You need to be careful when choosing your friends. Ask yourself: are they worth spending part of your life on? Or will you just waste your time and theirs? Some people even think you owe them something when you try to help them. Athenodorus said he wouldn't even have dinner with someone who wasn't grateful for the invitation. He meant that he definitely wouldn't dine with people who think a fancy meal repays their friends' kindness. These hosts act like their elaborate dishes are generous gifts, as if stuffing themselves honors their guests. Take away their audience, and they won't enjoy eating alone at all.

On Peace of Mind, Section 7 39 of 100
Human Nature What Matters Most
Seneca — The Senator Original

In all cases one should be careful in one's choice of men, and see whether they be worthy of our bestowing a part of our life upon them, or whether we shall waste our own time and theirs also: for some even consider us to be in their debt because of our services to them. Athenodorus said that "he would not so much as dine with a man who would not be grateful to him for doing so": meaning, I imagine, that much less would he go to dinner with those who recompense the services of their friends by their table, and regard courses of dishes as donatives, as if they overate themselves to do honour to others. Take away from these men their witnesses and spectators: they will take no pleasure in solitary gluttony.

On Peace of Mind, Section 7 39 of 100
Seneca — The Senator

Next, we must judge the task we want to take on. We need to compare our strength with what we're about to attempt. The person carrying the load should always be stronger than the burden. Loads that are too heavy will crush whoever tries to carry them. Some tasks aren't just big by themselves — they multiply and lead to much more work. You should refuse jobs like these because they drag you into new and different kinds of problems. Don't start anything you can't back out of. Work on something you can finish, or at least hope to finish. It's better to avoid projects that keep growing while you're doing them and won't stop where you planned them to stop.

On Peace of Mind, Section 6 38 of 100
Freedom & Control Knowing Yourself
Seneca — The Senator Original

Next we must form an estimate of the matter which we mean to deal with, and compare our strength with the deed we are about to attempt: for the bearer ought always to be more powerful than his load: indeed, loads which are too heavy for their bearer must of necessity crush him: some affairs also are not so important in themselves as they are prolific and lead to much more business, which employments, as they involve us in new and various forms of work, ought to be refused. Neither should you engage in anything from which you are not free to retreat: apply yourself to something which you can finish, or at any rate can hope to finish: you had better not meddle with those operations which grow in importance, while they are being transacted, and which will not stop where you intended them to stop.

On Peace of Mind, Section 6 38 of 100
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Ancient philosophy, in plain English.

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