On Peace of Mind, Section 7 — In Plain English

Seneca — The Senator

You need to be careful when choosing your friends. Ask yourself: are they worth spending part of your life on? Or will you just waste your time and theirs? Some people even think you owe them something when you try to help them. Athenodorus said he wouldn't even have dinner with someone who wasn't grateful for the invitation. He meant that he definitely wouldn't dine with people who think a fancy meal repays their friends' kindness. These hosts act like their elaborate dishes are generous gifts, as if stuffing themselves honors their guests. Take away their audience, and they won't enjoy eating alone at all.

Seneca — The Senator Original

In all cases one should be careful in one's choice of men, and see whether they be worthy of our bestowing a part of our life upon them, or whether we shall waste our own time and theirs also: for some even consider us to be in their debt because of our services to them. Athenodorus said that "he would not so much as dine with a man who would not be grateful to him for doing so": meaning, I imagine, that much less would he go to dinner with those who recompense the services of their friends by their table, and regard courses of dishes as donatives, as if they overate themselves to do honour to others. Take away from these men their witnesses and spectators: they will take no pleasure in solitary gluttony.